Men Vs. Women: Appreciating The Differences In Your Partner

This could just be me… but I’m of the opinion that the majority of men and women can have COMPLETELY different viewpoints in life.

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I mean, someone even wrote a book about it: [amazon_textlink asin=’0060574216′ text=’Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus‘ template=’ProductLink’ store=’poms2moms-20′ marketplace=’US’ link_id=’4bcd5379-b454-11e8-9f46-35fbc68b4e63′]! I bet that author is rollin in the big bucks…

But how can two people look at the same situation, and have two completely different perspectives and solutions?

Whether it’s day-to-day life, marriage, raising kids, hobbies— we have different ways of thinking, problem-solving, and communicating.

Scientifically speaking, we are actually wired differently.

I can be a bit of a psych and science nerd, so this type of information intrigues me. Don’t worry, I’ll save the intense reasoning and discussion, but you would be surprised at how often these programmed differences make an impact on our everyday lives.

Of course not all men and all women think this specific way, but generally speaking, I believe there are a few common themes regarding the way men and women behave. And for a little comedy, I provided a few example scenarios of each one.

 

1.) Men can (and like to) focus on one thing at a time.

Women…well…our brains can accumulate more thoughts and ideas in a 5 minute span than my shopping cart can fill during a trip to Target. (That’s obviously a lot.)

I personally envy a man’s brain in this sense. Sometimes, I would love to be able to have a calm brain; one that can only process or care about one thought at a time. Men have the beautiful ability to compartmentalize thoughts (waffle brain), and women have the ability to process and multi-task most of the time.

For most women, every thought is connected to another in some way (spaghetti brain). I remember learning about this in one of my college courses, and loved the analogy…because it’s so true.

SCENARIO #1 – Overthinking.

Woman becomes pregnant.

Woman: “Is the baby okay? Why do I feel this way? Are these feelings normal? I wonder what the gender will be? Do we make enough money to handle this new responsibility? What is safe to eat? When is my next appointment? What should we name it? When should we tell our friends and family? Should we take classes to prepare?

(AKA worrying at its finest!)

Man: “You’re fine. Classes? F no, we’ll figure it out when the baby gets here.”

[amazon_link asins=’0761187480,B0113WE0QS,B000052XHI,B01B5ITZ4M,150114667X,B072B8X4G2,B001GS4UDS’ template=’ProductCarousel’ store=’poms2moms-20′ marketplace=’US’ link_id=’4458f9bd-b45d-11e8-9d6d-09b1c6d8c379′]

2.) Women worry more.

It’s in our DNA. It’s not pretty, but it’s realistic.

Men appear to be more practical at times. They can take a situation and roll with it. Women will worry and lose sleep every night over a situation, many times allowing it to consume them. Again, this is something that I envy of my husband.

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SCENARIO #2 – Worrying.

Kid has first day of school.

Woman: “Do I let her take the bus or drop her off? Oh my goodness, will she get lost? Will she make friends? What if she picks her nose and someone makes fun of her? What if her outfit isn’t cool?”

Men: “Bye baby! Have a great day!”

3.) Women are [amazon_textlink asin=’1948209217′ text=’planners‘ template=’ProductLink’ store=’poms2moms-20′ marketplace=’US’ link_id=’ca74331e-b456-11e8-a660-878a3bf6eeaf’].

Good, structured plans make me feel happy inside. I think it’s pretty common to see women finding joy in establishing plans, [amazon_textlink asin=’B073T78FT3′ text=’crafting‘ template=’ProductLink’ store=’poms2moms-20′ marketplace=’US’ link_id=’dcb64575-b456-11e8-ae16-5f23dee37689′], [amazon_textlink asin=’B00SEFEYAK’ text=’decorating‘ template=’ProductLink’ store=’poms2moms-20′ marketplace=’US’ link_id=’eb08f576-b456-11e8-909e-771bf0083cb3′] a home, and planning a party (weddings…hello!).

Men like to help, with clear direction of course, and show up for the enjoyment.

SCENARIO #3 – Planning.

Going out for a few hours.

Woman: Packs clothes, bottles, bags, milk. Packs another bag. Gathers toys. Grabs a blanket in case it’s cold (*Note: it’s summer). Asks when they’re leaving. Asks how long they’re staying. Asks what they’re eating and who is going to be there. Worries about the dog being alone. Kisses the dog 5 times and gives him or her a treat because she wants them to feel loved and appreciated. Goes upstairs to change and fix hair.

Man: Throws on a t-shirt and waits impatiently by the door.

4.) Men mayyy be just a little more decisive than women.

Okay, probably a lot more. (See how I couldn’t even decide on the decisiveness of that statement??)

SCENARIO #4 – Decision-making.

Choosing a restaurant (obviously, the most important decision).

Woman: “I don’t care where we go…I’m fine with anything.”

Man: “Okay, let’s get Italian.’

Woman: “No, I don’t really crave Italian” (said no woman ever, but let’s just roll with it)

Man: “Okay…let’s get burgers”

Woman: “Um, I don’t really want burgers either. I want something healthy, but I don’t care where we go.”

Man: With increased agitation… “Okayyy…let’s get….”

5.) Men and women have VERY different interpretations of what it means to be intimate. 

You know what I mean. You want the PG-cuddles… hubby wants the X-rated.

SCENARIO #5 – Intimacy Part 1.

Cuddling.

Woman: Leeches onto her partner for dear life hoping to get a good cuddle sesh in. (Others do this too, right? Or is it just me? See—-spaghetti brain.)

Man: Too hot to cuddle (as he sets up a king size pillow to act as a barrier).

…which leads to

SCENARIO #6 – Intimacy Part 2.

“Getting it onnn.”

Woman: Exhausted, hangry, not in the mood, feels “blah”…the list goes on and on.

Man: Ready to make moves ANY time…or most ANY time!

….Can you or can you not relate??

This can appear pretty comical; however, it is REAL LIFE. We think and act so differently from one another. Differences can tend to cause a bit of frustration, but can also be a blessing at times. Different ways of thinking can offer balance and the ability to be flexible to understand and appreciate different opinions.

Although it can be challenging, it can be very eye-opening to examine a situation and try to see if from another person’s perspective. This is important in any type of relationship. I love the idea of thinking about the following questions, when trying to understand someone else’s viewpoint:

• Where is this person coming from?
• Why might it be significant to them?
• How can their viewpoint bring value to my life or to our relationship?

How do you and your significant other have similar or different ways of thinking? How does this affect your day-to-day lives?